FUNNIEST FACEBOOK STATUS

1-I think Facebook needs a "NOBODY CARES" button right below the status update.
2-Wow! You`re photos really don`t look like you in real life. Maybe you`ve edited them too much?
3-Liking your own status on Facebook..is like high fiving yourself in public
4-People liking my status from a week ago on Facebook proves that I have stalkers.
5-Looking at people`s mutual friends and saying "OMG HOW DO YOU KNOW THEM"
6-Facebook is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall.
7-That akward moment when someone you really hate send you a friend request..
8-Your real friends write on your Facebook wall when its Not Your Birthday.
9-When I read your status , I mentally correct your grammar mistakes.
10-Before Facebook, I never realized so many people had birthdays...
11-I SAW YOUR COMMENT BEFORE YOU DELETED IT.
12-I left MySpace for Facebook, and now I`m cheating on Facebook with Twitter
13-Does anybody know how can I send an enemy request on Facebook?
14-I`m back.. from my Facebook vacation
15-I made my Facebook status: "I kissed a girl"and then I liked it...
16-Sitting down real quick to check Facebook and Twitter...an hour later, I`m still there...
17-If you aren`t on Facebook, everyone you went to high school with just assumes you`re dead.
18-Log into facebook, look at notifications, talk to friends, scroll down the newsfeed, stalk Profiles & log out.
19-If you want to cry use a tissue, not your Facebook status

20-My Daily Needs : Food- ..........▀ 5% Water- ........▀ 1% Sleep-.......... ▀ 4% Facebook-.... ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ 90%